A Story for a Monkey
by surforst
Summary: Well finally writing for my Monkey related audience. Here's a tale about Mr. and Mrs. P. Enjoy! [Oneshot]


_"If you had a million Shakespeares, could they write like a monkey?"_

-- Stephen Wright

**A Story for a Monkey**

I.

"So how are you doing Fredrick?" Mr. Possible, or James, leaned forward as he spoke into the microphone near his computer terminal. Leaning back he waited for a response from the other member in his conversation as he sipped his coffee. It wasn't very good coffee mind you but it helped keep the rocket scientist wired enough to keep working through the late hours of the night. If luck was with him he wouldn't be one of those unlucky chaps this time around.

"Fredrick good." Came the simple reply from the computer as a line of text appeared confirming this response. Smiling James nodded his head, happy that the monkey they had strapped to a rocket and sent up the station was doing well. It was good to know after all.

"Is everything working fine up there?"

"Station good." James nodded glad that the station he had helped designed was working as expected. It was what he had expected of course but it was always good to get a confirming set of eyes on the scene as well. After all he dreaded telling the boys down at the pentagon about yet another failure or mistake. They were still unhappy about him launching the new spy satellite up into orbit ahead of schedule.

"So how are the experiments going up there? Going to get me that report on time?"

"Fredrick work when get bananas!" James winced as the computer emphasized the last statement remembering that Fredrick latest shipment of bananas had been late. The chimp was truly intelligent and even understood the basic concept of capitalism. He worked for them and he expected pay. Simple as that.

"Don't worry Fredrick the bananas are on the way so how about getting me that report before the boss man comes a looking for me. I might be a rocket scientist but I still have to please the board after all." James took another sip of his coffee hoping he'd get the chimp to cooperate on this. The last time he'd had to ask his daughter to fix the sitch after all and that had been a rather low blow to his pride yet again. It was even worse when it turned out Ronald had added his own comments into the report. Hours spent editing out comments like 'booyah' and 'coolio rockets' from the report had not been a fun experience at all.

James continued to wait as he watched the screen seeing if Fredrick would reply. About ready to give up he finally got a response. "Fredrick write if get story."

"Story? Why would you want a story?"

"Favorite author too lazy to write lately. Need something. Dr. Possible tell story and Fredrick be happy. Dr. Possible be happy too." James frowned as he looked at the screen not believing he had to negotiate with a monkey.

"What type of story Fredrick?"

"Story about giant robot or boy turned into magical girl. Fredrick miss updates on stories. Dr. Possible tell story?"

James frowned as he listened to that shaking his head. What sort of demented stories did this obviously crazy author write? Giant robots was just the insane dreams of college engineering students overdosing on caffeine and as for changing boys into girls James didn't even want to venture a guess. Clearing his threat he regarded the screen. "Sorry Fredrick but I'm purely a non-fiction sort of guy. I can't stand people who make up stuff. Show folk!" Shaking his head in disgust he looked at the screen feeling a little bit of anger. Show folk were the worse sorts of people followed only by politicians who wrote up the tax laws!

"Then tell Fredrick about you and your mate?"

"Who Jim? Well he's Australian and that's about all I know." James scratched his head trying to recall more about his fellow coworker.

"No tell story of wife. How did Dr. Possible find love with wife?"

"Oh...well I could tell that story." Sitting back James took a sip of his coffee ready to tell his tale.

II.

"So buddy you going to show us some of your moves?" James frowned looking at the three members of his posse before he nervously looked around the club. At the moment they had decided to go out and try their luck at picking up girls instead of spending another night debating the finer points of Space Adventure's ship designs.

"Please gentlemen why send a child to do a man's job. Just sit there and watch as I Drew Lipsky the greatest...person at picking up women ever!" James sighed as he looked over at his friend Drew who was currently sitting across from him chuckling evilly under his breath.

"Drew we're talking about real women here. Not more robots like the last bunch you 'picked up'." James smiled as he saw the expression of anger on his friends face. It was still a joke worth cracking apparently.

"That was over three weeks ago and you know it! Besides I was just in an unlucky streak."

"What unable to find the remote Drew?" James smiled as Chen joined in on the joke as Drew's face grew even redder.

"Come on Drew you don't want to pop a vein after all that's Bebe's job right?" Ramesh comment caused James to pause as he looked at his friend.

"What?"

"Well you know she squeezed him when he first showed them to us so I thought...never mind." James shook his head at his pal before turning back to surveying the club.

"Well Possible, do you think you'd be able to pick up a girl?" James looked over at Drew as he now smiled in his direction.

"Very easily Drewbie. In fact I'll pick up..." James surveyed the room and saw a red headed girl sitting off in the distance with her hair tied back in a ponytail. "Her!"

James smiled as he looked at his 'prey' but his smile quickly slipped as his so called friends started to laugh. It was Ramesh who first was able to make a comment. "Please James like you'd be able to pick up a hot thing like that. How about aiming lower my friend."

"I so can pick her up!"

"With what?" Chen leaned forward as he looked at James. "Face it man we have a bad streak for a reason. Maybe Drew's right to build himself a robot girlfriend even one so poorly built."

"Yeah...hey!" Drew's outraged cry was ignored by James as he stood up looking at his friends.

"I can pick her up and I even have the perfect pick up line. Now watch and learn!" James smiled as he turned around playing his pick up line in his head as he walked over to the girl. 'I couldn't help but notice you were undressing me with your eyes. Just felt I should say hello so you have a name to go with that image.' James smiled happy with that line.

As his heart pounded in his chest he closed the distance between him and his 'target' of choice this night. Clearing his throat he stood behind the girl and said the line he had practice so much. "You undress eyes!" James voice came out in a squeak as he said his line and his face went red instantly upon realizing his screw up.

The girl in front of him turned quickly in surprise her blue eyes wide with shock. "What was...James!"

"Ann?" James voice rose even higher as he realized he had just hit on one of his friends. His face burning red he could see the smile spread across her face.

"James are you trying to pick me up?"

III.

"Am I undressing my eyes James?" James winced as he heard the mirth filled voice behind him as he sat on the edge of the campus fountain. Turning around he saw the familiar girl with a set of blue eyes looking back at him with a very large smile plastered on her face. For the first time he regretted forming that study group in which he meet her. If he had known he'd give her the chance to mock him like that he would have stayed quiet during that instead of cracking all those stupid rocket jokes she seemed to like.

Frowning James simply shook his head and turned back around. "It's not funny!" He leaned forward trying to ignore the girl but noted to his frustration that she sat right next to him anyway.

"Oh come on James it is very funny and you know it. Though I have to admit I'm flattered you even tried to pick me up though I don't understand your pickup line at all." James kicked a rock next to his trying to ignore her but despite his efforts all she did was continue. "I mean I guess you meant you liked my eyes but that doesn't make sense since you couldn't even see them. Unless of course you say that to every girl?"

"That wasn't what I was trying to say!" Finally frustrated he looked back up at the girl next to him as she smiled in his direction.

"Then what were you trying to say?"

"Promise not to laugh?" James looked at Ann as she smiled and slowly nodded. Satisfied he continued. "I was going to see that I noticed you were undressing me with your eyes and offer my name. Happy?"

He blinked as Ann blushed and stepped back a few feet. Her hand went to her chest as her mouth opened in shock. "How did you figure it out?"

"What?"

"I thought I was hiding my secret lust for you so well. Oh whatever shall I do now that you know my secret?"

"Shut it!" James turned back ignoring her as she promptly started to laugh. Fuming he kicked the same stone again wishing for the life of him that he was just back in his room working on his pet rocket projects.

"Oh come on it was funny. I mean its not like that time you armed that mouse and set it loose on the school campus."

"I said I was sorry for that. I just felt bad for the mouse that's all."

"Right...so you want some advice?" James looked back up again surprised by this question as he looked into Ann's face. Her expression told him she was serious but the offer just sounded so odd.

"What sort of advice?"

"Like how to pick up girls. I mean I'm your friend after all and as a friend I'm telling you that line won't work." James frowned again but decided to swallow his pride for once.

"Alright...so how are we going to do this?"

"Well pretend I'm a girl you want to ask out. Now try to give me a pickup line that is actually good." She smiled as she said this before sitting yet again next to him. James noted with slight irritation that she liked to sit really close to him.

James frowned as he looked at the red head sitting across from him before shaking his head. "Alright." Clearing his throat he looked her in the eyes leaning forward. "Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?"

"Nope try again."

James frowned as he looked at her shaking his head in frustration. "Fine! How about this one." Leaning forward again he smiled at her reaching his hand out. "Are you tired because you've been running around in my dreams all night long."

"Now that one is just plain creepy. Try again."

James snorted as he leaned in again looking right into her eyes. His hand came up gently cupping the back of her head as he smiled keeping his eyes constantly focused on hers. "Astronomers throughout history have looked to the heavens to find the stars and to find meaning in this universe. I have only to look into your eyes to find both."

James smiled as he backed up a pace looking at Ann as she looked back at him with a slight blush on her cheeks. Then a smile spread across her face as she shrugged her shoulders. "Better but far from being the babe magnet you think you are James."

Frowning he put his hands on his hips looking right back at her. "Fine little Miss Perfect, how would you do it?"

"Listen and learn."

IV.

James smiled as he leaned back taking a sip of his coffee as he finished his. He looked back at the screen as he heard the computer's voice begin talking again. "Story over?"

"For now Fredrick I got to get home to the missus after all."

"But no love?"

James smiled as he sipped his coffee standing up and gently stretching before looking back at the screen. "My friend romance isn't something you make over night. Just wait till the next story and get me those reports ok?"

"Ok."

James smiled as he logged off and turned to walk out of the place. He was looking forward to making it home for once on time and the surprise his wife had promised him. Of course the surprise was ruined a bit when he noticed that her little French Maid outfit was missing from the closet but it was all good. Just more reason to make sure he made it back home no matter what. "I'm looking forward to tonight way too much to miss it after all."

With a smile on his face and bounce in his step James continued walking.

End

* * *

A/N: Well decided to write this out since I've always wanted to do a story about a younger Mr. and Mrs. P. Hope you all liked it and if so I might come out with the next one. Anyway making progress on the other stories though I changed the collaborative story completely from what I had originally. This means of course I had to delete almost all of the scenes I had written up to this point but I figure it is for the best. Going to take a while longer to get it done though and with school and work we will just have to see.

On another note I noticed I'm coming up on the anniversary of my first published story. Odd that. Well as always keep on reading and writing.

Disclaimer: I don't own KP! Leave me alone already!


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